Recently I was filling out an employment application. At the end of all applications are at least three identity sections. One has to do with gender, the other military, and yet another disability. A choice has to be checked off in all three categories, and in all three categories, you can check the box that says, “I chose not to identify.” An example would be in the gender section, where the applicant must choose one answer.
It usually goes something like this;

Female
Male
I choose not to identify

Each day we are showing the world what our identity is concerning the things of God and the Bible. John wrote in Revelations 3:15-17 “I know your deeds, that you are neither cold, nor hot. So, because you are lukewarm, neither hot or cold, I am about to spit you out of my mouth. You say, “I am rich.” I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.” But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked.”

Most would agree that our world has gone nuts; If you are one of those, then maybe you cannot see what the rest can see. Most people reading this understand what I am trying to say here without being unkind to anyone because that surely is not my intent.

We get up every day and go about “life.” It’s not hard to see if someone is male or female. Well, usually anyway, unless we’re on the wrong side of town where odd things take place, and the new transgender thing is acceptable in that place. Even then, we can usually tell if a person is male or female. We can also identify the one who doesn’t like their gender and are trying to be something that they are not. Gosh, we all have eyes, and it just is what it is. With that said, God loves all people equally, and we all have deep value in His eyes, and we “Jesus followers” should be mimicking our Fathers’ thoughts and behaviors. He is our Father who loves his children, even though He doesn’t always approve of all our behaviors. HE is God, and He is Father. He sets the standards.

The same is true with the scripture reference of Revelations 3. We are all either hot, cold, or lukewarm and make no mistake, we ARE ONLY ONE of them. And just like on a job application we must choose one, and that choice shows up in how we live our daily life. We can say we are hot, but we’d be a liar and stating false things if we don’t live our daily life in the hot zone, so to speak. Some want to be known as the “cold group”. They’d be the atheist, to include those who believe they should and will live life as they see fit, and usually are great crusaders for trying to convince others that it is the path to follow because if you don’t, you are being “controlled.” (as though we aren’t all controlled by something, even if it is just that we’ve made ourself to be our own god.) And the lukewarm group is a large group in society today that can come off with a good masquerade because it is crucial to them to be liked by everyone, to be popular, to do whatever the group is doing at any given time without judgment. That person thinks little of themself and needs affirmation from the wrong source to their value. They know how to wear a mask and pull it off well. They are the fakes. That person can dress up in Sundays best, have the perfect bumper sticker and speak the best Christianese as Joyce Meyers often says. But if that same person is lazy, rude and unmannerly at home; if they don’t have a heart that longs after God and His way, they for sure are lukewarm. Christianity is not a show; it is not a place to go, but it is who we are. It is being a Jesus follower in our thoughts, our attitudes, and lifestyle. It is not that we are perfect by any means, but when we make a mistake, we acknowledge it, ask forgiveness and get back up and keep moving forward. Repentance is NOT just saying I am sorry. Repentance is changing directions; it’s around about-face, in breaking bad habits and behaviors. It is GOD that gives us the power and ability to do this, but we do have the responsibility to take action. We can know that we shouldn’t lie, but then we have to NOT lie. We can know we shouldn’t be lazy, but knowing isn’t enough. We have to take action against that thing, which is not of God. It is just time for us all to grow up and put away childish things. He never leaves us on our own to change ourselves. The Bible says it is the power of God that takes us from glory to glory, but first, Jesus has to have control and be made LORD of your life. That is good news.

Which one are you? Which one am I? Folks, this is a question we’d all better be willing to ask ourselves because the day will come when whatever we are, hot, cold, or lukewarm, will be made public for all to see anyway. (Matthew 10: 26) Not only that, but God already knows, and none of us can escape the fact that our whole life on earth now and our eternity to come will be a direct result of this fact. Am I hot, cold, or lukewarm? Chose carefully, you’re whole life and eternity depend on this decision.

Hot
Cold
Lukewarm

It would seem that every time we turn around, we are hearing statements about the GRACE and MERCY of God. Usually, they are very true statements, and we are ALL thankful for the fact that God is merciful, faithful, kind, and full of GRACE to his children. And none of us like fire and brimstone messages that push FEAR. Nevertheless, there is another side that if we are interested in TRUTH, that we must be willing to see and acknowledge. My opinion, nor yours, really matters. God is God and who HE is, is who He is. NOTHING will change the fact that what we THINK, matters at all. God has given each person a way to know Him, and that way is the same for us all. We don’t have to understand the HOW the Bible ever was written that it could be 100% accurate as GOD chose to use certain people to write down words that according to Him, are ALIVE, ACTIVE and POWERFUL. The Bible calls “the WORD” sharper than any two-edged sword”.   A sword has two sides, one of GRACE AND MERCY,  the other side is the God that is jealous, and just, and a God that says, “if you love me, you will obey me.”

The Bible also makes another distinction. It states that a person that has not accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, (The Bible says, “I am the way, the truth, and the Life and NO MAN (or woman) comes to Father God except thru me.”) and puts HIM in the driver’s seat of one’s life has no way to even UNDERSTAND the Bible, and revelation knowledge that God gives to His children. So… when you are talking to someone about spiritual things, and they stand there looking at you like you have lost your mind don’t get mad at them, they REALLY do not have a clue what you are even saying. The good news is that 100% of everyone ever born into this world must come to God the same way, and 100% of us have the same, right, ability and free will to choose to do so. There is only one way. The Bible makes it clear that this world was handed over to Satan and all his demon followers when Adam and Eve sinned in the garden. The fact that the majority of the world follows the ways of the darkness, still cannot keep any one of us from laying our lives down as we recognize that we are sinners, that we cannot do life without God and need HIS help.

Furthermore, it remains true, like it or not that “hell” is as real, as “heaven” is, and all of us are going to end up in one of those places. Again, our opinion does not matter. This is TRUTH. Hell was created for the devil, not humankind, so don’t blame God if you end up there because you think you’re smarter than God and don’t want anyone telling you what to do, how to live your life, what friends to have, etc, etc…  You have the same choice as I do, and as everyone does.  Just remember if you are an adult, and if you do what nearly everyone does and have a family, your choices about God will be the foundation of your children; good or bad. Parents that try to fit in with the world are not being parents at all. We are not called to be friends with the little people we are responsible for raising. We are called to be teachers, guides, disciplinarians, as we teach them right and wrong— and YES, there is a right and a wrong, a black and white. The “gray areas”  we hear so much about nowadays, is because we live in a sinful and fallen world that belongs to Satan and HIS children.  When Jesus died on the cross for you and me, he stated that He was leaving humankind with all power; power to CHOOSE and authority to reign. The majority of humanity chose the way of darkness, just like the Bible said they would.

So back to the title of this particular writing, do you find yourself “feeling” bad about yourself?  Rather than doing what the world does and say “oh, poor baby, you are fine, you are a beautiful person, you are worthy” etc. I am going to say something totally different and some people will call me mean and unkind. That’s okay; I am not those things I happen to care about you in a different way than maybe most. I care about what kind of person you REALLY are inside. I care about your eternity. I care about what kind of husband you are, or wife you are, and friend you are. I care about what you are contributing to this fallen world. Yes, it’s your business, but it is also mine to minimally hand you a mirror so that you can look at yourself in the light of TRUTH. Sometimes feeling bad about our self means the ALIVE, LOVING, BEAUTIFUL, and powerful Spirit of God, has been urging you to surrender your life to Him and you have been refusing. That’s called “conviction.” Conviction is a good thing.  You can never get away from His presence and his love- no matter how much you reject Him, he will continue to knock at your hearts’ door and let you know He wants you to come home to Him.  If you feel like you just don’t measure up, don’t dismiss those feels as low self-esteem. Look at them, examine what is actually going on inside you; it just might be God helping you to see that you are on a path that is going to cause you to lose it all. Those feelings you have about yourself might not be so bad after all. Our loving, Father God is urging you to finally see that without Him, you really are all those negative things you see about you.

If you stop and allow yourself to THINK factually instead of emotionally, and chose to see the TRUTH, this world has absolutely nothing to offer us. What does it matter if someone likes you or is your friend if you both are leading each other to eternal destruction? This life is but a moment in compared to eternity, that never ends!  How you live, how you treat people inside the walls of your home is who you REALLY are. You say you’re a good parent, but are you leading that child to the cross, or to nothingness than means nothing except destruction? It is time. It is time. If you find yourself feeling bad about yourself, I implore you with all that I am, to actually look in that mirror that allows you to see not just the outside but the inside. The Bible says that God knew you before you were formed in your mother’s womb.” (Pslams 139)  Think about that. The real you- who you really are, and not the body that houses who you are, was alive with God before you were formed. It is God’s desire to come back to that place where you came. On the earth, surrendering who and what you are to Him so that you can walk this life being truly connected to true life, and eventually, once this life is over finding yourself, safely and forever back “home.”

Have you ever had a life issue that seemed to chase you wherever you went?  One that showed up in your thoughts, or as you listened to other people sharing their life experience; one that you could get up on the pulpit of life and preach?  The issue that keeps me up at night; the one I think about when at the grocery store, looking at LinkedIn, or seeing what is trending on twitter and Facebook.  It is about the lack of decency and integrity in the corporate world. As you read this blog, keep in mind that my main focus is on unethical behaviors in the workplace. It includes all things unethical, but specifically the casualness that takes place in Corporate America in recruiting, hiring, layoffs, terminations, employee contracts and communication with employees all the way through all the above processes.  There are only a very few companies remaining in America that hire with the intent to keep.

Before I jump on my pulpit let me first share a bit about my background. Prior to my breast cancer diagnosis, I worked in the state of Texas as a licensed private investigator. My areas of expertise were not just civil matters but workplace safety, work comp injuries, fraudulent claims, misrepresentation, wrongful termination, inner company actions that were against corporate policy and public declaration. For instance; A company cannot rightfully advertise being a company known for employee retention and corporate responsibility maintaining their reputation of treating employees with the utmost respect and then not do so without some liability.  My former business name was Establishing Truth Investigations. My present NPO is “Establishing Truth Ministries”; the main focus is sharing in the needs of, and giving an intent listening ear, encouraging, giving hope as well as material needs, as funds come in, to breast cancer patients. My registered motto for both is “Turning The Light On Dark and Hidden Things”®  I have been driven by truth my entire life and I can humble myself with no problem and state that the only times my life has went haywire has been when I failed to see the truth. Without doubt, truth is a life-long quest.

It is my hope that these words will impact the lives of decision makers causing them to rethink how they do business and see the seriousness of their actions and decisions on other people’s lives. We have a culture where corporations, and individuals’ lives revolve around money, and success regardless of the cost. The culture within needs some huge awake up calls and changes. Will that happen? Most of us are doubtful, but some of us hang onto to HOPE, like a dog hangs onto his favorite bone.

 We the people realize that business is in existence to make money and are not welfare agencies. Most have a product or service and they hire people to fill positions that will help their products and services to make them the most money. The people get paid a wage to work for them for which most are very grateful. My question to you is this; Is there a right way to do business and a right ethical way in which you treat people? ALL people, all races, all creeds, all ages and gender? Can’t we all make money AND treat people as our businesses most prized asset?

What is your guiding light? Where is your moral compass coming from, and is it pointing due North?

With a little bit of Texas twang, let me say this. Y’all that know me, know my moral compass comes from my belief in God and His authority to rule and reign in life. Yours may be from a different place, or another god. One thing the general population agrees with, is that most religions proclaim the belief in truth, honesty, morality, kindness, and being a person of integrity. Quite frankly I know a lot of people who are not, I quote, “religious” but they are really good, caring and honest people. In most cases they were raised with attentive parents that taught them valuable life lessons through a daily lifestyle of being that kind of person. I remember when I was a little girl and as all little girls sometimes are, I would be naughty. Worse yet was when my brother and sister and I decided to be naughty together at the same time.  I could count on my dad or mom saying something like…. “what’s wrong with you, were you raised in a barn?”  I assure you that they were not talking about the ever so great bromoniums in our culture today, but rather with the animals that were just animals and knew nothing other than being an animal.

There is a great sense of hopelessness in the world today, and in a big sense it seems like many were raised in the barn. A high percentage of society has declined into no respect for life and the philosophy that their problems are due to everyone else and the expectancy that the system should take care of them. Recent articles that have been showing up on professional websites, discussing the fact that we have generations that have never known lack; have not traveled to third world countries to see what poor really is. There is such a false sense of entitlement in our land today that it is downright scary. Corporations are having to cater to this way of thinking to keep employees, and hang on to with their very lives, those that are of retirement age or older because they are the last of the really skilled and full of knowledge, people. Now don’t get offended; there are a lot of skilled people in our country who have great college degrees, but lack the years of experience needed to have the knowledge to do what most job descriptions are asking for.  There are a few of us still alive, that are doing our best at holding the torch trying to light the way and assist others to grab the lifeboat and get on board to saving our culture. Political correctness says don’t combine religion and business, religion and politics, religion and education although those that are actually educated with true and actual documentation of history know it was never meant to separate any of them. There are a lot of good people out there that are not religious, so whether you personally believe in the one and only God who created heaven and earth, or your beliefs are with other gods or no god, we all know decency, kindness, ethics, integrity, trust and honor are the basis for solid business.  David Barton, a well know historian brought up the fact that no other government document such our Declaration of Independance, historically has lasted more than 17 years, except for the United States of America. On July 4, 2019 we will celebrate our countries birthday of 243 years. all which is born out of Biblical principles. (See David Barton at https://wallbuilders.com/)  The purpose for this particular writing  is not about that, but I encourage each person to research the subject themselves. If you want the facts, they are there to be found.  As with all governments that fall, the erosion starts at undermining the fundamental truths. We are on a slippery slope folks; in fact, I’d say we are well on our way down that hill at a high rate of speed at his point and we are about to crash. Is there an answer? Yes; be willing to speak up and be heard. If enough of us will, we can affect change.

We have become a power-hungry society. Business owners, Corporate boards of Directors, C-level management, HR leaders, all the way down to front line supervisors enjoy that sense of power that comes with their position.  It can be a blinding light that becomes deaf to the fact that a GOOD leader is a servant; furthermore, the intoxication of their position often blinds them to the human lives they are literally destroying to the point that they don’t even care. It’s all about them. It’s about them looking good, feeling good, being promoted and so on and so forth while they are wielding devastation on others.  Why do they make the decisions that they do? Simply because they can. Of course the canned reply is…”Its best for this company.”  Pretty soon a company that was built on honor, integrity and hard work, morphs into a political machine that hires only those that will do their dirty work, so they make more money and gain more notoriety in society.   There is little to no accountability in corporate America any longer and we have a side of government that is promoting all the negative of what we have become today as a society. Corporate America is in bed with State and Federal agencies. They do unethical things under the table that no one can do one thing about because they are covering for one another. It’s all about their priority of power and money over people. Sadly “because they can” usually wins over ethics and doing the RIGHT and JUST thing.  Where do we turn? What do we do?  What was once a highly respect company, becomes laughing stock behind their backs, and a robot of doing what they do at the cost of every employee they have. Never forget that the VP of HR professional that is following a company protocol and misuses people, will in the end be misused by the same company. None of us are that valuable. It’s really true, that whatsoever we wield out, will come back to us.

I choose to believe that there are still good people in the world today. In all businesses, there are good people scattered throughout.  If our leaders would be that good person, making ethical decisions and being a leader that people want to follow, that alone would aid in showing others the way. Sometimes corporations need to take losses if it means you must, in order to keep your word; in order to do what you say your intent is; in order that people come before money. And employees also have a huge responsibility to give to their employers their very best. Be honest, be teachable, do your job ONLY, while you are at work, be kind, help your co-worker, do more than is expected of you.  Not all businesses fall into the category of which I have written and by no means do I want it to sound that way, but this I will unequivocally state as truth; All of you, whether it be your corporation, and if founded by you, then it is YOU, and everyone under you. The buck has to stop at the top, and when you allow those under you to lead people astray in recruiting, to bring devastation to employees through layoffs and terminations,  and do business under the table, it is your fault for allowing it.  Society has just accepted it as natural for a corporation to hire people and terminate the same people when they are done with them; I’d say you have a problem on the inside that someone doesn’t know how to hire the right people; people that will be honorable to you and your purpose. Perhaps it’s equally about you being as dedicated to your employee’s success as they are yours. There are people that really do know their stuff.  We all run around wanting to look good and have the “right image” hoping others think well of us.

Corporations like families and friends want to belong and groupies are formed, and birds of a feather flock together. Well, maybe it’s time to dismantle these groups and get on board with right priorities. All of us are empowered by people who agree with us. We need more people around us that will challenge us to do better and be better, not agree and help us feel justified in our actions. We cannot expect an employee to give what we ourselves are unwilling. We have to live out genuine caring of others, truth, integrity and honor in all that we do. Somehow, we have lost touch with the fact that we can be still be the best corporation while maintaining honor, integrity, and treating all people justly.    Whatever the facts are about your decisions and actions, is the truth about who you really are.  Some of you need to draw a line in the sand, make honest, rightful amends, and start doing business as one deserving of being well thought of.  This goes for Corporate reputations, people within corporate America, individuals working for and with corporate America, all the way down to each person in every family that make up society. That would include all of us.

I could write a book on this subject, but many will not want to read it, for they might be forced to see themselves as they really are, rather than as they want to believe they are. The mask and facades that we all put on everyday need to come off, and we need to look into one another’s eyes and genuinely apologize for the hurt that we have caused others and fix it where we can, and if we have no means to fix it, we can minimally have a genuine sorry and contrite heart, and then change what we do from then on.  It is true what they say, “to say you are sorry without change is just manipulation.” You’re only trying to make yourself feel better after nearly destroying another human being. 

I hope you will watch for my next blog; Part 2 of “People before Profit or Profit before people?”  In this blog I am going to share personal factual experiences that people have had in their careers.

It is time that we all look introspectively and check out ourselves and how we do business. If you are the one reading this and thinking to yourself…. that you will do whatever you want to because it is part of your job, then you are also the one who might need to recalibrate your compass; Or not, then you are also one that is helping the destruction of a great country that is built on freedom. We began as a free nation 243 years ago; man had the freedom to use his/her skills to build businesses and be so blessed. We came from nothing and grew into a prosperous nation. Many are hanging on to that hope that we won’t lose it all, but it requires that we ALL do our part.

I hope you had some revelation through this message. If you enjoyed this read, please subscribe through email to be the first to know about my most current posts! Also, if you would like to share a short version of your story, please email me at givinghope51@gmail.com. I promise to keep your identity private.

It’s well past wake-up time; Statistics though a dull read, are worth taking the time to educate yourself.

The attention tends to be on the adults- (“let’s all take selfies”, because the majority in our society are more concerned about “self” than anyone else.”)  Shame on us.

The cry of my heart for years has been….”what about the children?” Who is going to stand up for them? On top of the hideous estimated 900,000 abortions to our precious unborn babies, our living children are treated in many cases as though they have no human rights- and most especially no more than their caregivers will allow them to have. The laws of our land have much to be desired in the case of protecting our children.

According to Childhelp.org the 2014 studies show that every year more than 3.6 million referrals are made to Child Protection Agencies involving more than 6.6 million children (each referral can include multiple children).

The United States has one of the worst records among industrialized nations, losing on average between four and seven children everyday to child abuse and neglect. Yes, they die.

Yearly referrals to state child protective services involve 6.6 million children and around 3.2 million of those children are subject to an investigated report.

Mental health disorders go hand and hand in the lives of abused children. Alcoholism, alcohol abuse, illicit drug use, smoking & drinking at an early age, depression, suicide attempts, and psychological personality disorders to name a few.

In 2014 there were 1580 child abuse/neglect fatalities in the US. (4 to 5 children daily die. )

In 2017 according to the CDC.gov; 1720 children in the USA died from abuse.

80% of child maltreatment fatalities involve at least one parent as the predator.

¼, yes one-forth, of a child’s elementary class is being abused.

In one study, 80% of 21-year-olds who reported childhood abuse met the criteria for at least one psychological disorder.

Statistics by invisiblechildren.org

Nationally over 7 million U.S. children come to the attention of Child Protective Services each year according to a Children’s Bureau 2015 report.

1. 37% of American children are reported to Child Protective Sevrvices by their 18th birthday (African American children are reported at 54%)
2. 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused before they turn 18 years old.13 
3. 34% of people who sexually abuse a child are family members. 
4. 3% of girls were age 10 or younger at the time of their first rape/victimization, and 30% of girls were between the ages of 11 and 17. 
5. 96% of people who sexually abuse children are male, and 76.8% of people who sexually abuse children are adults. 
6. 325,000 children are at risk of becoming victims of commercial child sexual exploitation each year. 
7. The average age at which girls first become victims of prostitution is 12 to 14 years old, and the average age for boys is 11 to 13 years old. 
8. 4 million children received prevention & post-response services.
9. Highest rate of child abuse in children under one (24.2% per 1,000).
10. 80% of child fatalities involve at least one parent.
11. Estimated that between 50-60% of maltreatment fatalities are not recorded on death certificates.

NATIONAL CHILD ABUSE STATISTICS

• 4 million child maltreatment referral reports received.
• 207,000 children received foster care
• 3% of victims are neglected.
• 2% of victims are physically abused.
• 4% of victims are sexually abused.
• 9% of victims are psychologically maltreated.
• Over one-quarter (27.%) of victims are younger than 3 years.
• 9% of the child abuse victims die from neglect.
• 9% of the child abuse victims die from physical abuse.
• 4% of children who die from child abuse are under one year.
• More than 90% of juvenile sexual abuse victims know their perpetrator.
• Child abuse crosses all socioeconomic and educational levels, religions, ethnic and cultural groups.

What can we do?

 First we must be the voice of those who aren’t allowed a voice. Children should ALWAYS come before adults.

We can keep our eyes and ears open; be observant. Abuse is not that difficult to see. Abuse is usually a lifestyle. What’s going on next door? Abusers will go out of their way to make their children look bad- in their mind, it takes eyes off them.

There are absolute sign of abuse/neglect

1. Purposeful Isolation. Abusers will cut people out of their lives and their children’s lives.
2. Abusers threaten their kids; “don’t tell anyone.”
3. Most likely you will hear screaming, yelling, and see kids trying to get away to get safe.
4. Police reports state calls are by neighbors and teachers that see signs; bloody noses, bruises, lack of proper rest, not being able to concentrate, and fear-based behaviors.
5. Abusers might up and move- just to get away from what people know.
6. Abusers use fear tactics; threats, rationalization, and lying.
7. Abusers will often make fun of their kids and degrade them publicly.
8. Abusers are usually victims.  They will befriend people who will listen to their sad stories and those people become their enablers. Healthy is heathy and unhealthy is not that hard to see. Realize that you might have a part in keeping a pattern going. Abusers don’t need sympathy; they need genuine help that only God and professionals can give them. Care enough about them to guide them to proper help- if they receive that advice GREAT, if they don’t, call the police every time you know they are abusing their children again.  Yes, it’s hard; Yes, it’s immensely sad, but we have to help the children.

References:

Childhelp.org the 2014 studies

CDC./gov

http://www.invisiblechildren.org

Genesis 1 says…in the beginning God created heaven and earth, and in the book of Revelation it states that this earth will, at Gods appointed time, come to an end.   We are in that place in the timeline of The Earth where hearts are growing cold.  II Timothy 3: 1-5 “This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affections, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God, having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof.”

It’s kind of scary. Most of us don’t live casually and allow the above-named things into our lives. But… really? We are all human. Many people struggle with pride, or being high-minded, or unthankful.  How many cause divisions by falsely accusing others? How many put their opinions and so-called knowledge above the actual truth and facts? Perhaps its time to get real with our selves.

We are living in that day.  So how can we protect ourselves in our walk with God, but then veering off that path, and start down a danagerous and slippery slope?

Its natural in all loving relationships to maintain contact. If we love someone it is in our hearts to see them, call them, and stay closely connected. Not only is it in our hearts but it is what we actually DO. If we do not do the “DO” part, we should know that it’s just NOT in our hearts.  The same is with our relationship with God the father, who came to earth in the form of a man, the Christ Jesus. If we are in relationship with Him, we make it a priority to staying in daily contact with Him. We do that through reading his love letters to us (The Bible), the same way you would read letters, or texts, or emails from a loved one that was living in a different location than you do. We’d reach out to Him often to say, “I love you, I need you… you are my life.”  We do that also by prayer. Prayer is not some form of religious ritual where we bow our heads, close our eyes and say words. Prayer might look like that, but it is also a constant awareness and conversation going on all through the day. It is equally as much “listening” to His still gentle voice that is easy to miss because of the loud busy voices in our own minds, and in this assaulting world.  We can have those conversations with God while at work, while doing dishes, while driving, mowing the lawn, doing chores, going to the grocery store, or in the middle of the night. Eyes don’t have to be closed nor heads bowed. God is as close to us as the breath we breathe.  He just wants to love us, and as in all good relationships- cultivation is most important to keep that relationship fresh and alive.

I have learned to be very “self-aware” as you also likely have.  I watch myself; I guard my mind, thoughts and words. I am aware when fear is knocking at my door, insecurity, and thoughts that do not line up with what God says about me; Its important to stay aware constantly because the Bible says that our “minds (thoughts) are an enemy of God. There is a constant battle going on between good and evil and the one we feed is the one that will have victory in our lives. At times I find myself having to be extremely proactive to shut that other voice down. Actions and thoughts of love, compassion, kindness, gentleness, peace is the life we are called to. Life is hard and for all of us there are reasons to “feel” we have a right to grow hard and cold, but God did not call us to examine our “rights” but rather to obey His word. When I am tempted to have a cold heart, I know I am nearing the edge of that slippery slope. And… being on the edge is dangerous.

I grew up in Michigan. Winter was a good time for us; My sister, brother and I would drag our sleds up to the top of the hill behind our country home on 4^th Street and once at the top, would set our sleds in place and climb on them. The back acres were more of a slope than a hill, so initially we’d have to propel our bodies forward in jerking motions while sitting down on the sled to get it moving. It always started off slow, but as the sled hit a certain point, there was no turning back, we’d be flying down the hill at a good speed. We’d laugh all the way down, and then start all over again climbing the hill just for those moments of fun when we were going fast. My point is that there is a tipping point of a slope where the only way to stop the downhill trend is to bail off, and even then, the sled itself will keep right on going.  The same is true with how we live our lives here on the earth. We cannot afford to play around at the edges of the slippery slopes of sin, unkindness, or allowing our minds to have destructive or unloving thoughts.  It is easy to suddenly find ourselves in a momentum that we cannot stop, and then we find ourselves among that group of people that Jesus spoke. Luke 13:21-23 says….” Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of My Father in heaven.  Many will say to Me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you workers of lawlessness!’

The GOOD NEWS is that Jesus is always reaching out to us. Our society today wants scripture changed to agree with their lifestyle, but Gods word stands forever the same, yesterday today and forever. He is not going to change for any of us. God through the ministry of Jesus and the Holy spirit (The unseen spirit of GOD almighty) is ever drawing us to himself. He accepts ALL that will call upon the name of Jesus. He told us in his love letter to us (The Bible) that “I (Jesus speaking) am THE way, THE truth and THE life and no man comes unto the Father, but by me. ” (John 14:6) Coming to the father through Jesus is acknowledging HIM as Lord and Savior, and making his Lord (ruler, King, the final authority to all things) of your life. Making Jesus Lord is not about following a bunch of rules, but rather having the privilege of following a path that leads to peace, abundance and life. It’s in our hearts to follow our master; the “rules” and guidelines are there to protect us, not to steal our fun.  He knows the deceiving, lying enemy, (the devil) how easy it is to walk in his deception. Our protection is obedience to the wonderful safeguards He gives us in His love letter to us, the Bible.

Lets pray for one another. Instead of being critical, lets pray and encourage. Yes there are times for correction (I get it everyday of my existence and I am so thankful for it!) but right correction is done with gentleness and love. Let’s do it the right way with words that are salt and life, and actions that show others we are sincerely concerned for them. The facts are that none of us are perfect and we have all made serious mistakes. God had mercy on us, let us have mercy on one another. Its “wake up time” because the hour is late on this earth. The Bible says that faith outside of love is worthless.(“Faith works BY LOVE.” (Galations 5:6, I Cor. 13, )) So if you want to make your faith work, LOVE.

Matthew 7:13
Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and many enter through it.

John 16:13
However, when the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth. For He will not speak on His own, but He will speak what He hears, and He will declare to you what is to come.

Blessings to all of you. We need one another.

We have all had the experience of carrying out smelly trash and putting it in the dumpster. In Texas where I live, a good part of our year the temperatures are 90 degrees and above so where we place our trash cans, can be a big deal. Who wants that bad smell penetrating their homes anyway?

Recently my sister sent me an article that she had received in one of her online devotional series. It was like WOW, one of the best I’d ever read. Perhaps the reason I reacted so “WOW” about it, was that I recently had an experience where someone came to my home, sat down, and with great emotion related a situation that had nothing to do with me.   I realized too late that a guest came to my house and handed me their trash and I listened. My passive listening was nonverbal, “oh thank you for giving me your trash.”   It wasn’t actual garbage, the kind that you carry to the dumpster, but I use it as a useful visualization that the writer of the article (by Amy Carroll, “I Believe This is Your Plate of Trash) used as a good word picture.

Smelly trash can come in different forms; one, it can be real trash that we need to take outside to the garbage dumpster, or it can be emotional trash that hurts, burdens, or comes in the form of gossip or situations that are negative about others. I get it that there are times when real negative issues must be deal with, discussed for resolution and healing, but the question always is,  does a particular plate of trash that I, or you, are handing to someone else, involve them and can they fix the situation? If the issue is about ME, or I need correction in something, then yes, I will, by all means, receive your plate of trash, look at it, dissect it, maybe even smell it, if that’s what it takes for me to fix something I caused. At that point, I would also realize that it is not a plate of trash, but rather a needed confrontation that will bring healing if handled right.

Everyone is a bit different, and where we all tend to carry emotional baggage, how we handle it can vary greatly. There are volumes of books writing about personality types. Off subject a second; my favorite book on the subject is “Myers-Briggs” on the main 16 personality types; check it out- you’ll enjoy it!  It explains that we all have a dominant personality trait.  Face it; we are all different. If we tend to be intolerant, we don’t appreciate that others might see things differently than we do. The interesting fact is that we all see through a lens based on our personality and life experiences.  There can be a zillion opinions on any given subject and let’s get real here; we all think our opinion is the right opinion.  The truth is, opinions are just that; opinions. Truth is truth, facts are facts and opinions have nothing to do with either. Opinions come from that lens we each see thru and no lens is exactly alike. Furthermore, if you are involved in the professional world, then you’ll know the terminology EQ, EI & EIQ.  That subject is for another days’ blog but long story short, it’s about emotional health or emotional state of being.  If a person has a low EQ than they don’t usually deal well with conflict, or uncomfortable subjects.  They might tend to withdraw or be aggressive and or, defensive. People with a low EQ tend to be “prideful know it all’s” or have a habit of spilling their emotions all over the place.   Frankly, I sometimes wonder if that is most of the population, but…. moving back to the subject at hand I suggest to you that it might be useful to #1. Recognize what a plate of emotional trash IS. #2. Choose to stop taking our plate of trash to someone else’s door.  #3.  If someone tries to give us a plate of trash, don’t open up your hands to receive it; Rather lovingly, kindly, with hugs and kisses ( you get the point) tell them NO, reminding them it is THEIR plate of trash, and they can put it in the garbage dumpster, or take it back home with them.  Again, I am a profound advocate to communicate for resolve and healing, but the ONLY thing any of us can resolve is our own stuff, or our part in that stuff.

 Much damage has been done to people and relationships because someone sat there and received (listened to) someone’s plate of trash and lived life, as though it was a plate of truth and it was not, and rarely ever is.  The sad fact is, plates of trash can end up at the church potluck dinner and get passed around and around, and before you know it, everyone believes the contents of what was on the plate.  It’s a hard lesson to learn if your personality type is “to be a helper.”  You might think it is helping someone else to be a good listener when, in fact, it is only concreting the lies they have fabricated or twisted in their minds. The sad truth is that when a person talks about their issues over and over again, it creates brain pathways (scientifically proven) to the point that they are now actually believing their own lies.

Just an FYI; every family, corporation, and circle of friends have issues and problems. I am not suggesting we all walk around like zombies pretending that they are not there. What I am suggesting is to deal with them, and let’s get on with living! Our purpose of resolve and healing must be paramount instead of spilling our emotions on everyone around us.   Every time we “vent” to another person we are responsible for the fact that we may have just tainted someone’s opinion of a human being that, like it or not, God loves just as much as He loves you. I think we are all going to shocked when we stand before the Father someday and give account for every idle word that comes out of our mouth. Moreover, if you are one of those people that so pridefully think that you are not affected by what you see and hear, especially repeatedly, you are what the Bible calls, deceived. 

Let’s stop handing our plate of trash to others, and equally, let’s not open our hands and receive anyone else’s plate of trash. They need to take care of their own, just like I need to take care of mine.

Matthew 12: 36-37 says “But I say unto you, that every idle word that man shall speak, they shall give account thereof on the day of Judgement, for by thy words thou shall be justified, and by thy words, thou shall be condemned.”

Have a happy, garbage free day.

 May 27, 2019

I stepped out a couple days ago to share my personal journey of blogging. I’ll try to make this short, (good luck with that, Jill) but I want to explain my core beliefs, and moral compass so that my readers will sort of know where I am coming from. I hate assumptions, so I’ll just be transparent. I really should have said this in blog # 1. I am learning as I go! Sorry folks.

There are so many bloggers out there, and many of them have so much good stuff to share and pass on. Someday I hope I am considered among them because writing is something that I love. Filed away are many chapters of my potential book that I have started, and there they sit; maybe someday.  Blogging is a way to be able to share life and connect with people daily. I intend to not focus on just one thing- but the many things that life seems to bring our way. It may be my downfall because this is precisely why I have started and stopped writing my book so many times. Focus, focus. lol

 As I have been working up to the point in getting ready to launch my blog, I had assessed myself, my subject matters, my goals, weaknesses, and strengths. Life seems to give us so many challenges, we might just as well list them, cut them into cute little pieces of paper like a fortune cookie message and throw them in a big bowl; then every day, reach in and grab a new subject. The problem is with each new day many will have to be added. So where I have some main subjects in mind, I will also occasionally reach in the bowl and grab out a new subject. I’d love to hear from you! What do you think needs to be brought out into the open so we can all grow and improve?

My subject matters will be geared more toward women than men, although I sincerely hope to make it enjoyable to all. Honestly…. I almost named my blog “All Things Woman” but during my brainstorming for subject matters and chapters to write it was very evident that where a good portion of my subjects are geared for women, many are not.  So, let’s see what God will do with this venture. And yes, I said GOD.

Just to be clear;  My being (who I am)  is centered in God the Father, the creator of heaven and earth,  who came to earth in the form of a man, and his name is  Jesus.  The Bible says that he now dwells at the right hand of the Father, and has a deep presence on the earth and in the lives of those who invite him;  the name of that presence is the  Holy Spirit. (Spooky? Ya, I get it.)

 For me anyway, who I am, and my core beliefs are in centered in the ultimate truth that is above all so-called truths and facts and that is the living word of God called the Bible. It really is God’s love letter and book of helps’ and instructions to mankind.  I am NOT “religious.” My particular view of “religion” tends to be negative in realization that mankind has actually divided people and groups with names, walls, and doctrines called churches. The Bible teaches that WE are the Church and that we are to go into all the world…and proclaim all things Bible by how we LIVE out our daily lives. All of us have fallen into the trap of saying we believe one way and fail to live out what we say we believe. That’s called being human and falling short.  I started out my adult life very rocky (and will address that story soon), but my purpose is to state that I judge no man or woman. I desire to stay on track and finish this race victoriously; Frankly, we are our own worst critics anyway, and we don’t need fingers pointing at us. That old saying is still valid, “that when we point a finger at someone, four more fingers are pointing back at ourselves.” Not cool. I want to connect with all people, all backgrounds, and beliefs. I have often had the thought that society has infiltrated our thinking so much that we think we must agree with everything a person is, says and stands for, to show them love, respect, and support in their endeavors. Jesus, our prime example, did not do that. He was criticized by the religious bigots for his associations. I chose to be a Jesus follower, not a people pleaser, or one who puts “my opinions” above the ultimate truth. 

1 John 4:8

He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.

• 

The dictionary defines the word apology as “a regretful acknowledgement of an offense or failure; an expression of regret.”

My life experience brings to mind often an apology is needed or would be helpful for the healing of an offense or misunderstanding—to include cleaning up ones own reputation.   I don’t know if it is the time in which we live but it is an act that has two extremes.

 1. We think we are OWED an apology and if we don’t get it, we live offended.

2. Through an act of something we did or an act of something we should have done and didn’t, or even a response to something we considered wrong or rude done to us…we still are responsible for our reactions… right? Well, what if an apology MIGHT help. Is it ever too late?  No. The truth is there are times when we don’t pay attention to that voice in us that is suggesting we might need to go to someone and say “I am sorry….for______” (you fill the blank in) and if  left unchecked over time, could turn into the very catalyst that causes someone to stumble. To those of us that claim Christianity, we know what our Lord would say about our stubborn prideful attitudes. Mature Christians at least intellectually know that not listening to a prompting of the Holy spirit or counsel of someone wise, can lead to a hard heart, and that goes no place good. Need I say more?

Our lives on this earth are very short. I know as a child, teenager and young adult I thought I was invincible, and though I knew people died, it was not something I EVER thought in connection to myself. Most of can say that. AND if you are now in the second half of your life, you like me, are stunned with how old you are and seriously wonder where life went. The very precious days in which we do have left should be treated as such and the facts are that not one of us are promised another day. We all got up this morning with plans and many people in this world will never go to bed tonight for they will be in the morgue. It would be good if we lived every day of our lives like it was our last. We’d love more, love better, be more forthright in keeping relationships right, we’d watch our actions, and reactions, as not to be the cause of someone else stumbling spiritually… we’d do things so different. We’d include others, we’d smile, we’d say things that are important to our hearts and to others; we’d forgive ourselves and forgive others…. we’d hold no record of wrongs done. We’d pray more and do battle in the spirit, for our loved ones that are lost. This doesn’t mean- we play dumb, or don’t deal with life as it is, but it means we keep ourselves on track and where we need to be. In the end we are all individually responsible for our decisions, but I want to remind you that Jesus said Matthew 7:12-14 that “In everything, then, do to others as you would have them do to you. For this is the essence of the Law and the Prophets. Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the way that leads to life, and only a few find it.…”   

Many, think they are Christians according to The Bible, but it is only head knowledge and not relationship and experience. They are not Christ followers. There’s a difference.

One more thing; Life is hard and many of us have went through very traumatic experiences. Many of us feel people have REALLY done us wrong, so much so that they are responsible for changing our lives forever. Depending on those who have done us wrong, if they are good people, its good to realize and deal honestly that there are always two sides to every story. Sometimes (Yes REALLY) people have to morally make very hard choices based on highly moral issues and they did their best in doing so. There is a time that you must let it go and give it to God and rejoin life with love and forgiveness. Otherwise unforgiveness, blame and hate will eat you alive and you will become the essence of all that you have harbored, and you will be become partners with evil in acts of unkindness, destruction and division. There is ALWAYS someone who had life worse than you… and they made the right choices to choose Gods way rather than then the way that is destroying. I pray for you, to choose God.

Matthew 5:39 and Luke 6:29 are two of many scriptures that speak of turning the other cheek….

Matthew 6:14 says “ forgive and you shall be forgiven…… “

Ephesians 4:2: “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”

1 Peter 4:8: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” John 15:12: “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.”